Filipino Pepsi Commercial

Recent Obsessions

1. Bolo ties like this

2. Unusual deaths

3. Genesis' Invisible Touch



4. Stephen Hawking

5. Pepsi Dry (only available in Japan)

6. Cooper, Seattle's Cat Photographer that's actually a CAT. 

7. NBA Finals, but only for scientific analysis. One observation is that the hoops is clearly too low. A second, is that white professional basketball players resemble ogres, but this requires further investigation.

8. Tyler Hamilton v Lance Armstrong regarding doping allegations. Cycling community has been in an uproar. I would like to compare performance enhancing drugs to plastic surgery. We enjoy seeing people use it. Plus at a professional level, it's all about money and really should be up to them. Also another sidenote:  To loosely quote Ethan S, "The biggest slap in the face to US Postal in Tyler Hamilton's 60mins interview was that his doping products arrived "FedEx or DHL..."


9. Palestine and Harold Camping and this man's speech. Tie.


10. Chinatown, the movie. 

A Bikey Weekend with the Tour of California

"A convertible!" by Mike. Commentary by Dedrick. With myself, Jocelyn, C. Horner and my phone.

Currently, I am recovering from a sun filled day of cheering and bike riding while Mike is at the Team Radioshack wrap party celebrating with the likes of Team Radioshack's Tour of California winner, Chris Horner, Levi, Andy Schleck and a bunch of cycling enthusiast celebrities, I'm sure. So I'm taking the time to share.

All week long, I've been following the Amgen Tour of California. Yes, at my desk, but very briefly and discreetly. With much excitement, Mike and I planned to go up to watch the mountain stage (because the riders go much slower and it's "easier" to watch) in Glendora and Mt Baldy.

I haven't touched my bike in a long time and I haven't done a long climb in even longer. So Mike just gave me a 30 minute start at the bottom as well as a backpack full of sandwiches. Somehow I thought the climb would take maybe an hour. No. Longer than that. He eventually passes me with his teammates.  Luckily, friendly older gentlemen that looked well in their 70's were kind enough to push me until they passed me as well.

Finally at the top, we found perfect places to watch. I had one goal- to use my cowbell. So we ate sandwiches, drank beers, and waited for the pros to come by. Lots of fun!

"You guys are going real fast" by Mike. With Hime, the peloton and myself

Once we descend the mountain, which was much longer for me, we recover at Lucky Baldwins to watch the HD coverage of the race.

Today, Mike and I then not only watch the last stage of the Tour of Cali, but also the Giro d'Italia and the saddening interview with Tyler Hamilton on 60 Minutes that revealed eyewitness accounts of Lance Armstrong taking performance enhancing drugs. This is only saddening because well I like Lance as a hero type. Everyone loves Lance! And frankly, it's becoming more and more evident that most of the guys in the peloton are using something, but not all of them are Lance Armstrong. And unfortunately the only way to stop all the drug use is to make the contests more "realistic" and to not be bored with "realistic".  Because realistic is ugly like my sunburns and my crawl up and down Glendora Mountain Road. Nobody enjoys watching that.

My Thoughts on the Impending Doom and Other Jokes

My former place of internship, Family Radio, has come across a bit of attention recently with their belief that the Rapture is happening this weekend.

I was an assistant editor/intern who was helping with Mandarin Bible readings that were broadcasted to mainland China. Although it was possible at the time to be persecuted for listening to such programming, FR wanted to reassure the Chinese faithful that there was a God. I couldn't understand what I was editing with the exception of certain words, nor did I strongly agree with the agenda at hand, but I hope there's no one sitting in a Chinese prison due to those broadcasts. So in the incident that someone is overly prepared for this Rapture and did something particularly impulsive like gamble their earnings on a losing Greyhound or bought a solid gold cowboy hat or purchased a fancy phone by Amp'd Mobile (Who's that? Exactly.), I hope that FR is ready for some reconciliation. And if this Rapture business is all inaccurate like homeboy's previous miscalculated doomsday, all of those believers just got flushed down the toilet bowl full of crap in Suckersville, USA.

Then there's good old, Stephen Hawking, who explains that all this is hogwash fairy stories and that religion is for the most part something that helps us cope with death. Professor Hawking has always been much better at Trivial Pursuit: The Quantum Physics edition than I have been, so this is definitely something to consider as I am also a believer in quantum physics. So hmph...

Many people have started to consider most of the natural disasters to be the start of this supposed apocalypse. But look- why should our super powerful all-knowing God be so archaic? My thoughts of this supposed "doom" would super God to then start controlling our bodies from within Jedi style and have us go against everything we thought we believed in. I MIGHT ACTUALLY BUY CROCS AND WEAR THEM! I MIGHT ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND BIEBER FEVER! I MIGHT ACTUALLY THINK KANYE WEST HAS MUSICAL TALENT! O THE HORROR!

So in closing, fear is completely useless- shit happens or it doesn't. That's right, LeBron.

Look Mom, I'm Tweeting!

That's right. I'm a lemming, but a lemming that updates that Twitter feed with thoughtless banter regularly.



It will be the new home to all my brain vomit, if you're into that sort of thing.

Movie Reviews

French fries taste better with catch-up

The Kids Are All Right, comedy, USA (2010) Dir. Lisa Cholodenko
Cholodenko's subtle hints at emotion were so delicate that you too want to be a part of this modern and love filled family. Amazing performances by the cast. But I beg to ask, why is it that Julianne Moore can't be in a movie without having a topless scene?

Exit Through The Gift Shop, documentary, USA/UK (2010) Dir. Banksy
An incredibly well executed film that fulfills an artistic agenda to preserve the integrity of street art. Banksy's sense of humor buys your trust and takes you on an unexpected trip through a portrait of an artist. This movie reminded me of my long lost love with documentary filmmaking. (Note: I had graduated from film school with full intention to become a documentarian like Agnes Varda or Werner Herzog)

The Tourist, action, USA/France (2010) Dir. Florian Henkel von Donnersmarck
Despite using A-list good looking actors, Italy as a backdrop, and motorboat stuntwork, the story's cheap literary devices leave you unsatisfied like a peanut M&M with no peanut.

True Grit, western, USA (2010) Dir. Coen Brothers
As much as I love westerns and the Coen Bros, I fell asleep during this one. Plus, young child characters who speak like adults are nothing but unbearable to watch. I'll leave this movie with John Wayne


The Ten Commandments, drama, USA (1956) Dir. Cecil B. DeMille
On Easter, the best egg you can find is Yul Brynner's dome in this Moses epic. DeMille depicts a rather colorful interpretation of Exodus through huge sets and graceful camera movements that reinforce the grandeur of the film. For a time when filmmaking didn't have the luxury of "fixing it in post (production)", this movie is as well crafted on a larger than life scale.

Princes and Bad Guys

So Bin Laden got X's for eyes, Kate Middleton became a Duchess, Chrysler reported its first profits since filing bankruptcy. The American outlook seems hopeful and this is the most foreign and awkward news to me. And here I was thinking Obama was going to announce an uncontrollable asteroid was headed straight for us and that we were all going to die. (Were you scared? I was scared.)

Friday's Morning Thoughts

People who don't drink coffee scare me.

That Diet Coke from last night did me wrong. So much for living on the edge.

If Charlie Sheen were such a winner, he would've owned a rocketship already. Hey winners, will you all take a step forward? Hi, Paul Allen! Not so fast, Sheen!

Kate Middleton's dress is amazing! Go Team McQueen! Too bad Wills looks a lot like Frankenstein now.

OK it's Friday and I'm back to work. Time for some throat ripping.

Subtitles Make Things Funnier

From Love The Simple Life

From 30 Rock Things

Things I have learned about my local supermarket

1. Do not linger by the gelato counter too long if you don't intend to buy any. The cheery guy behind the counter will happily give you so many samples that you will feel obligated to buy a scoop.

2. The cheese counter has the coolest sense of humor

3. Buy some meat and someone will cook it for you to eat at the wine bar

4. Samples are happily shared to everyone even if you go by them more than once

5. The good beers are hidden in the back for those who are worthy enough for them

6. Their donuts are terrible unless you have taste for sawdust or recycled newspaper

7. The unassuming coffee bean roaster is much more knowledgeable than you would think. Those probably aren't prison tattoos.

8. Try not to drive here

Pajama Chic

Hi Zara April Lookbook, I'd like to introduce you to my closet.

You know you're working at a great office when

One of your concerned co-workers brings the lack of decorative Jean Claude Van Damme photos to your attention.

Quitting my job to become a dancer

Or not ...

My Brain Garbage

Here are some updates with no particular relevance or importance:

During the 2011 Paris Roubaix, I still rooted for Fabian Cancellara even though the winner, Johan Van Summeren, was a surprise and proposed to his girlfriend right after he won. 

In regards to my materialism, I am really into the new Vena Cava x Tenoversix stuff and Joe's T's and  $3000 japanese ice mold that makes perfect ice baseballs in seconds!

Recently it has reached the mid 70's here in LA. Recently I have purchased a fur hat a la Alexis from Dynasty. Recently I've tried to convince people that it's colder than it is.

We watched the Giants games this week. I only really cared to watch Brian Wilson. I read my book the rest of the time. If baseball commentary were anything close to any of Phil Liggett's commentary, it'd be much more interesting.

Los Angeles Open Houses have been my excuse to enjoy soondubu for dinner. (Korean tofu soup)

I listen to obscure, rare, and instrumental music at work. While it seems pretentious, I only do this to prevent my co-worker from singing along.

Last weekend I played Jenga for 3 hours on the Verdugo Bar patio. And for 2.75 of those hours I tried to build an Anne-sized tower. 

Did someone just club my jaw with a gold fist of awesome?

My new t-shirt compliments of the fine people at WOWCH

Race Report: LA Marathon March 20, 2011

"That was so stupid!" - me, my first words after finishing my first marathon on a windy stormy Santa Monica Sunday.

The beginning of my misery was waking up at 3:30am to prepare for the race. I had stuffed every pocket of my ultra-techy running gear with Gu's. (my squirtable food to help me run faster). Then covered all of that with my gigantic and hideous thrift store sweats and a garbage bag in hopes of staying warm and dry. (This later becomes a crock)

Mere and I catch a 4:30am shuttle to Dodger Stadium. This bus is full of equally sleepy racers, but just enough cocky loudmouths to drive me insane. These jerks found this to be the best time to brag about their past achievements.

4:50am - 7:15am We sit in Dodger Stadium in the cold and bored. At least it's dry.

OK so the race finally begins ... I shed my thrift store exterior and take off. Just in time for the storm to begin. Each mile was growing more and more uncomfortable in terms of weather. By mile 10, I was drenched and lost all feeling and function of my hands. At least, I learned how to use my mouth a lot more to tear open Gu packages and what have you. And what's that sound? Oh it's my squishy shoes because I had just run through 1/2 a mile of ankle deep water! Miles and miles of complete sogginess and wind chill. Everyone talks about mile 20 being the scorcher. No -- it's mile 26. As you turn onto what is called the home stretch, you get struck by a huge gust of wind coming from the ocean. Thanks, God, you got me there!

Finish time: 4 hours and 42 minutes. 12 minutes passed my time goal. Oh well. I was more concerned about pooping my shorts, which did not happen.

So as a completely depleted runner, you're happy you cross the finish line. But wait, you have to walk almost 2 huge blocks through picture taking and medal distribution and swag. This is useless to me because I still can't use my hands. Thank god they gave me this strange paper blanket to keep me "warm".

Overall, I'm in disbelief that I paid $150 to put myself through almost 5 hours of torture. Mentally and physically. Physically was the pain in my legs. The feeling that my legs weight 500 tons and my joints are aching. In terms of cardio, I was fine. Just leg pain. Plenty of "Shut up, Legs" leg pain! Mental torture-  I honestly knew that I would not be happy with myself if I walked at all. But when you're cold and tired and wet and in pain, it seems so easy to do. So I had to fight that urge.

 I was hoping for that end feeling of accomplishment, but when that blind guy and 470 others passed me in the last 4.5 miles, that went down the toilet, and thankfully not down my shorts (RIMSHOT!)

To summarize:

So, what was my favorite mile? 26th

Least favorite? 26th

Overall thoughts - Horrible. Thank god I didn't poop my shorts.

Favorite running gear - Lululemon all the way!

Do I recommend this to others? Yes. It's a great way to test what your limits are.

Will I do it again? Maybe. Probably not.

Currently: Cannot walk. Can hobble.

PS.

My marathon playlist was crucial through all of this. I highly recommend putting all of those songs that instantly make you want to hit something.

Here's an part of my playlist (as it's difficult to find suggested marathon music sometimes)

The Time - Jungle Love
Rolling Stones - Start Me Up
Supergrass - Moving
.38 Special - Caught Up In You
TV On The Radio - Wolf Like Me
LL Cool J - Mama Said Knock You Out
Cee Lo - F*ck You
Amy Winehouse/Mark Ronson - Valerie
Eurythmics - Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves
Peter Gabriel - Sledgehammer
MoneyGrabber - Fitz and the Tantrums
Motownphilly - Boyz II Men
Move On Up - Curtis Mayfield
Heartbeats - The Knife
California Gurls - Katy Perry
Justin Timberlake - Damn Girl
NERD - She wants to Move
Power Station - Some Like It Hot (still worked)
Miss You Much - Janet Jackson
Hip to Be Square - Huey Lewis and the News
The Negatives - Hood
Empire State of Mind - Jay Z
The Humpty Dance - Digital Underground
One More Time - Daft Punk
9 to 5 - Dolly Parton
Single Ladies - Beyonce

etc...

It's easy. Accessible. Mind numbing and perfect for HORRIFIC situations.

Mr. Cage

Recently, I was asked what my favorite Nicholas Cage movie was. I answered "Adaptation" but really, I meant "Honeymoon in Vegas"

First and goals

Happy Super Bowl!

It is the only day in America when it is appropriate to use football puns and I fully intend to take advantage of this.

Yesterday I competed in the local 10K run and won! (first pun) Most of the fast people were probably at brunch but nonetheless I was proud. As a trophy I received a copy of the race organizer's book- a self help book about achieving perfection. Hm

I think about all of my goals (pun) and how I achieve them. Or rather my interpretation of a perfect life for the time being. Instead of idling through the book's advise on pretty much advancing my modeling/acting career, I remember my very wise best friend's advice- clean your microwave.

So at first it may seem odd, and even distracting, but like any trusting, and maybe gullible, friend, I listen and do it. She suggests this so that I get rid of all those small menial things that annoy me so that my mind is not so clouded with them and that I have a clear mind in working towards those goals whether it be to learn a song on the ukulele or even finding a job or learning Spanish.

It worked. That 10k felt good. And now I'm at the carwash for the next achievements to be had Whether it was a gift of the magi, a wish on a shooting star that traveled lightyears, or even luck, I'll thank my friend and the microwave.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

What I do on my day off- Masked Mexican THUMB wrestlers

Don Rightodor v El Leftito

Coachella and my constant denial of hipsterdom. Real talk.

Coachella, Southern California's most crowded desert music festival, has just announced their 2011 line-up.  My reaction- I know where I will not be in April.

I love music. I listen to everything. I play instruments and have friends that play instruments. But why not Coachella? I appreciate that Coachella shares the work of hard working musicians to people who haven't heard their music. I appreciate this inspired outfits on the sexy music lovers. I applaud the kids who camp out or have all night parties at fabulous desert vacation homes. But I just don't feel comfortable there anymore. 

Beyond the fact that I can probably only recognize a handful of bands and this reminds me how out of touch I am with new music and thus igniting flashbacks of high school ignorance of then cool bands. A feeling I hope no one else feels. In addition to the 100 degree heat,  100 yard long portopotty lines in that heat, $5 waters, crowds and  I dread the fact that going to Coachella may just stir up my inner-ugly-superficial-LA-wannabe-model that wants to blend in with the other desert minxes who had just ransacked Urban Outfitters and Opening Ceremony. I just can't bear the shame, but that's not it.

I think I've  lost that romance for the music festival. That feeling of inadvertent coolness that comes when you see a band that you have respect for, that thought "o man I look like hot shit in these jeans/sunglasses right now", having respect for people who also like the band you have respect for, the whole excitement of how your pictures will look on Facebook when you get home, or hell the idea that you could be there and someone else couldn't (despite the thousands of people that can go). I lost it. Or maybe I just realized it's bullshit.

I'm older, an asshole and my sense of adventure is not picture worthy enough for a hipster.

But these are my well wishes: that people go to Coachella for the love of music and befriend people on a less superficial level. That those music geeks who are truly passionate about music become king and that they get to make out with models, or at least, wannabe models.